Biopsy again

Got the results from my third biopsy in three years. Benign. Scar tissue. The anxiety of it is overwhelming at times. The things we do to survive.

From Milgram to Malpractice

I endured a deposition on Friday. I was asked personal and intimate questions about my family and medical records. The experience was humiliating and hurtful. I was attacked for allowing myself to be the victim. And I wondered why I pursue this lawsuit. I pursue it because it is the right thing to do. If those that inflict pain and suffering are not held accountable, they will not learn from it.

Stanley Milgram conducted experiments in the 1960s on obedience. These experiments were a window into the capability of ordinary American men living decent lives to inflict unbelievable pain and cruelty – enough to result in the death of another human being. These men were told to inflict painful shocks on others to help them learn. The shocks started at 15 volts and increased by 15 volts each time the so-called learner got an answer wrong. There actually were no learners, but the participants did not know that. They believed they were inflicting the shocks. 26 out of 40 participants administered the highest level of shock. Every participant went to 300 volts. 5 stopped at 300 volts which was when the learner started pounding the walls and yelling in pain. The interpretation of this has been that when the pain of the victim becomes unambiguous, the chances improve that the perpetrator will refuse to continue (Packer, 2008). The rights of the victim are respected and they are no longer dehumanized.

In subsequent replications of Milgram’s work and follow-up interviews, Burger (2008) found that those administering the shock will stop if they feel accountable for their actions. If they feel that someone else is responsible, they would continue.

My breast cancer story is at: http://ihavebreastcancer.blogspot.com/

Hello Again

It's been almost 2 years since my last post. That sounds like I'm saying confession. I have been so busy. I'm trying to cram my life into this tiny space of time left. Priorities change when your life expectancy changes from 80 something to 50 something.

It's been 3 years since my diagnosis. Every check up is a new challenge. My last mammogram showed a suspicious lesion near the scar. An u/s was inconclusive. Monday I will have another biopsy. That will be my third in just over 3 years. I'm not taking this very well. I just feel overwhelmed when I think of what this may mean. Please send me good thoughts. It's so hard not to worry. My children still need me.